SOME THINGS PUBLISHING REPS HAVE ACTUALLY SAID TO ME

"Dinosaurs are great. They never die."

"This book is about Stephen Gately, from Boyzone, who is currently dead."

(Of a book of collected football chants, called Referee's a W****r!): "This one is called Referee's War."

"No really, you should order 20 copies of Cherie Blair's biography. People can't get enough of her."

"Of course that won't be the final cover."